Jokes about Men

Two confirmed bachelors sat talking, their conversation drifted from
politics to cooking.
"I got a cookbook once," said one, "but I could never do anything with it."
"Too much fancy work in it, eh?" asked the other.
"You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way -
'Take a clean dish'".

Harry's wife says, "Harry, do these jeans make my ass look like the side of the house?"
He says, "No, our house isn't blue."

How do you keep a Blonde busy(see below)
How do you keep a Blonde busy(see above)

So God calls to Adam and says, "Adam, I have some good news and some bad news. What do you want to hear first?"
Adam replies, "The good news."
God answers, "Well, the good news is I gave you a penis and a brain."
Then Adam says, "OK, so what's the bad news?"
And God says, "I only gave you enough blood to operate one at time."

Q: What is the difference between your wife and your job?
A: After 5 years your job will still suck.

Q: How is a man like the weather?
A: Nothing can be done to change either one of them.

Q: Why are men like commercials?
A: You can't believe a word they say.

Top Ten Things Not To Say To A Naked Man 1 This explains your car.
2 I never saw one like that before.
3 But it still works, right?
4 Are you cold?
5 I guess this makes me the early bird.

6 Ahhhh, it's cute.
7 Can I be honest with you?
8 Maybe it looks better in natural light.
9 Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
10 Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?